Obsessive Thoughts as a Result, Circumstance, or Action?

Hi Coaches,

I find that I have obsessive thoughts about a particular person I’m dating. When I try to do a model I can’t seem to discern whether or not this a circumstance, action, or result…. I don’t try to make it go away when it happens, I just observe and it seems to help dissipate the obsessive behavior. However, I am curious as to WHERE or WHY this is happening and I can’t seem to put my finger on it.

Is it simply about deciding not to think obsessively and replacing it with a better thought?