Other People’s Problems

Good Morning, Brooke/Coach,

Day 1 of April and Time Management….no fooling. As I approach my Diamond status, I am surprised that the growth and dives into the River of Misery just keep rolling on. I notice I still believe I will “arrive” someday and everything will be easy and rainbows and daisies and unicorns (and I’ll have all the answers and won’t need to ask for help….). I see the fabulous truth is that the challenges keep showing up and I keep showing up to face them. Life would be boring otherwise. Growth and figuring stuff out is my jam.

Anyway, my question is about my first model. I awoke early this morning and noticed I probably killed about 90 minutes in bed worrying about people in my life. It was 4:00 and I was in bed and didn’t want to get up, but when I realized this was wasted time, I got up to come and do my SCS homework. Here’s my unintentional model:

C – Other people’s problems (Husband’s health, daughter’s attitude, son’s silence, etc.)

T – If I am right and I can get them to do what I think they should, they will be better off. (Yes, a manual so I can be happy.)

F – anxious, pressured

A – judge them, spend a lot of time thinking about ways to get my point across, to get them to do what I think they should

R – None of us are better off. They pull away as I push and I am frustrated.

Intentional Model (I started with how I want to feel.):

C – Other people’s problems .

T – I understand what discomfort feels like.

F – Compassion

A – Offer help and let go of expectations of what they do with that offer. They get to do whatever they want and that’s OK.

R – I understand my discomfort??

I don’t really get the result of this. I think there’s something I am not seeing.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!