Outlet for my emotions

I’ve asked a couple questions before about step-parenting, and feel like I’ve been doing better at operating from a place of love.

A situation happened this week where something was completely out of my control, but affected me directly, and my natural instinct was to lash out. Is it ever appropriate to share your negative thoughts and emotions with another person? Not the stepchild and not my husband, but I feel like I need some outlet for expressing how I feel. I know I need to allow emotions to move through me, and I think I’m getting better at it, but the thoughts are still there and keep bringing up emotion every time I think about the situation. It’s like I feel the need to have my thoughts and feelings validated. That it’s understandable to be feeling the way that I am. That I have the right to. Is this just emotional childhood?

I wish I could speak openly with my husband about the situation, but he has so many of his own emotions tied up in his children that it just causes arguing. But not talking about it feels like we are just sweeping it under the rug and hoping it goes away. We have a great relationship otherwise, and I turn to him for everything else. The fact that I have nobody to talk to about this makes me feel very lonely.

Is there another way to cope with a feeling that keeps coming up about a situation you can’t control? Is talking to a third party ever helpful? Or does speaking a negative thought and emotion out loud just strengthen it?

C: Stepson
T: I have no control.
F: Anger
A: Lash out and then isolate
R: Distances my relationships

C: Stepson
T: I can control my thoughts and allow my emotions.
F: Honestly? Resentful. Thought loops back to why am I always the one who has to give in and change?

So I guess I need a better new thought?!? Thanks for letting me ramble about the same problem. I’ll figure this out eventually.