“If you don’t love me, that is a reflection of you, not me.”

So say someone has two kids, and one kid they love and the other not so much.
For the kid not being loved as much, it has nothing to do with them and everything to do with the person not loving them.
But isn’t it partially tho? Because there must be something about the kid that is triggering something in the person not loving them. So technically it is the kid that is the reason the person isn’t loving them as much.
If the kid was just like the other kid (the one they love) then they would love them the same, which is more than they love them now.

Maybe I’m digging into it too deep. But if someone doesn’t like me, it is me they don’t like. Maybe it’s the way I talk or the way I dress or whatever it is. But it’s me, those tendencies are me, if they don’t like them, yes it is them having something in them that doesn’t like those things, but if I didn’t have those tendencies they might like me better.

I see both sides. Trying to wrap my brain around the fact is is ALWAYS on the person doing (or not doing) the loving.