painful thought

I broke up with my boyfriend a few months ago. As I take away my buffers I feel pain. I have been feeling it. I left because we had many value mismatches, drinking, lying, healthy modeling and boundaries with children. I deeply loved this whole family. I know this was the right decision for me. The painful thought I am having is I want to love them. I am truly loving them in my mind and I know I am more valuable to them by stepping away and setting an example, I’m building my business of Stop Overdrinking. I feel strong when I think that my work is dedicated to them and my own family. Once I start on the thought network of I want to love them I review and I imagine him with someone else and then I feel hurt. Then I think I want to love him anyway and I try to feel good that he has someone else in his life. But that hurts and I know I can focus on my own future and not hurt myself with these thoughts. What is another way I can think about this?