Hello! One thing that’s coming up for me in my self coaching is that I go directly to panic and negative thoughts when I receive an email or text from my business partner or client.
I’ve realized that when I see a text or email, my brain automatically puts a panicked thought in my head of:
– I did something wrong / I screwed something up
– Have to “fix” it right away so I don’t get in more trouble
– I don’t know what I’m doing
I don’t know where this came from, but I’d love some help figuring out how to respond to my brain when these thoughts come up.
C – CMO at client’s office emailed me to let us know that our main point of contact is going to be let go, and asked to have a call about revisiting the other candidates for that role that we presented back in June.
T – They think we screwed up and expect us to do more work for free
F – anxious
A – worry, play out the convos in my head, fixate on it, don’t get other work done, wish I could fix the problem right now so I don’t have to worry about it anymore, work myself up with the “spin”
R – I enter the conversation with the client less powerful for myself and less authentic, and bow down to whatever they say
When I step back, take a deep breath, I’m able to say “I know I didn’t do anything wrong in this situation” (this is true of most of the situations where I have this panic – this is just today’s example), but that doesn’t stop the negative and panicked thinking.
My brain immediately makes this about something I did wrong – that I will get blamed for this, even though it wasn’t my fault. Someone will make me “wrong” about it, and because everyone thinks I did something wrong, I will have to do it again for free.
Any suggestions on how to address these negative thoughts when they come up?