A few days ago in my 1:1 coaching session I spoke about me being annoyed with my boyfriend and father of our 2 kids about him not reading some of the posts/documents that I’m sending him about parenting. I feel unheard and disrespected about it as I feel it’s very important we’re aligned regarding how we parent our kids.
My coach asked me why I thought it was important for their dad to read it and we dug into the fact that I worry for my son’s mental health and I fear for both our children as they grow up in a time with lots of pressure coming from peers and social media. As we kept digging deeper into these fears it perspired that the base fear is of them committing suicide at some point in their life.
My coach asked me what my thoughts were about that fear and two things came up.
One was that my mum always parented from a place of fear and the second one was that my partner used to be very depressed and had suicidal thoughts early on in our relationship.
We ran out of time eventually and I felt in the midst of it all. Hence I’m porting all of this here.
I few days have past and yes the thought has certainly shifted, but I still parent from a space of fear a lot of times. I think often it’s due to the fact that I’m unsure about how I parent if the way I need to for my kids and what they need.
I’d love to get some clarity on this. I know that it’s just a thought and that I’m choosing it, but haven’t been able to move away from it yet.