Partner shuts me out

How am I to react to my partner when he shuts me out a lot of the time? I’ll ask him what he’s doing or why he wants to do something in a certain way and he gets all defensive and then won’t talk to me.

We got engaged today and now I’m not really sure why but he’s sleeping on the couch and not talking to me.

I understand that it’s his prerogative to do and be whomever he wants to be, but I’m struggling with who I’m to be. I try positivity and support but end up frustrated because he just won’t talk to me.

I love him and have made a decision to marry this man, but I don’t want to feel responsible for his mood swings. I’ve suggested counseling, offered him life coaching podcasts and books, he’s not interested which is fair enough. I just feel so helpless and like maybe I’m chasing a sinking ship to the bottom of the ocean.

I know I can’t change him, but how do I stay me and love him anyway?