I would appreciate some help on another pattern I have with my work as a veterinarian.
I perform surgeries almost daily then spend a lot of time feeling anxiety about them. I will have the details pop into my head throughout the evening or weekend, sometimes it will be reliving a difficult part of the surgery but other times if it is an ‘easy’ routine surgery I will just have a thought that maybe I made a mistake or maybe that animal will have complications. Maybe I forgot to do something or maybe I should have spent longer checking before I finished up or some other similar thought.
The feelings these thoughts generate are fear or anxiety.
These thoughts are not based on any facts and they never actually are right — or at least not so far (says my fear mongering thoughts).
But the pattern causes me unnecessary suffering.
Please can you give me advice on how to approach this.
Here is an example
c surgery on the weekend
t maybe i left a swab behind
a buffer, be grumpy, stew on it
r i don’t enjoy my day off
t i would never leave a swab behind
a spend my day off not thinking about work
r better rested better confidence in general
– but my mind still says yes but maybe you did leave a swab behind.
This is based on nonsense because I would literally never leave a swab behind. But it still makes my stomach turn when I think it.
I’m grateful for your thoughts on this. Is this just like Brooke’s heavy purse. Feel the anxiety and carry on with my day? That’s kind of what I’ve been doing for a long time but I wonder if there is a better way..