Preschool parent compliments


Hi Brooke and coaches. I have a fellow mom from my son’s preschool that I consider a friend. Our kids don’t really jibe with other, and that is fine. We tried, but no. The mom and I support each other with our second babies, upcoming transition to kindergarten, etc. Mostly over text. She has texted me beautiful compliments about my kid, that I find to be true in my experience of him as well. And it feels great to hear her observations of him at times when she is in the classroom or something she notices that impressed her, etc. So sweet of her to share these with me. BUT. I have some thoughts that I need to reciprocate something beautiful to her about her kid. And I either haven’t observed him as much as she has observed my kid. Or I am not noticing things about him that seem extraordinary/worthy of sharing. I’m trying to tell myself to enjoy the compliments about my kid and not make it mean anything about me as a friend/mean person that I can’t find something nice to say about her kid. Maybe I’m looking for some other thoughts to try on around this?

C: Friend compliments my son to me
T: I should say something nice about her son
T: I haven’t seen her son do anything amazing (I suck for saying that)
T: Am I terrible to just say “thank you so much for sharing, that means so much?”
T: My son IS amazing (does that make me arrogant to say?)
F: Anxiety, shame
A: Indulge in confusion about *if* I should say something, *what* I should say, and what it means about me if I don’t find something nice to say about her kid.
R: Don’t enjoy the compliment, don’t enjoy the friendship

Even writing out this model, I feel silly for how much I’m worrying about this!

Thank you for your help!