Pressure to get things done, 2

> What is it about someone being in need that affects you?
I think I don’t want them to feel stressed. I see now that I am making myself stressed then. I wasn’t aware I thought that.

> Why did it feel urgent to act quickly to get his project done?
I thought I would lose the work if I said I could get it done in a couple weeks. I thought he would be disappointed. Ah, I am trying to manage his model and abandoning managing my own.

> He may have been counting on you to finish the project. Okay. But why does he get put at the top of the list?
I think I want his approval. 🤯

> What was your thought and feeling that led you to allow him to choose the timeline for your company?
T: he won’t ask me to do work for him again if I don’t do it when he wants me to
F: scarce? not sure the specific feeling. I feel a wavy feeling in my sacral chakra
F: allow him to choose the timeline for my company

And then I had this model:
C: I said “I’ll take a look at the staging site and my calendar and let you know probably after I see the screencast on my lunch or after work today”
T: he needs it asap
F: restricted
A: look at my calendar. tell myself I’ll fit it in somewhere this week. lie to myself about how long it’ll take me to do. say “I could get it done by the end of the weekend. Does that work for you?”
R: I fuck my schedule up / I am unrealistic about what I can get done