One thing I know that has held me back – unconsciously and I’m also aware of thoughts, too – is the fear that if I follow my purpose to be an example of what’s possible and if I go for my goals, that I am not going to be as present with my children or myself. I can see how this isn’t an awesome thing to think because I’m setting myself up to fail (go against my values of being present and connected to my loved ones and myself) every time I go for a goal.
But I’ve been doing it anyway. I’ve been working hard, taking massive action – and even scheduling in rest/family time – although I find at the stage my business is in right now I’m having to hustle and am working a lot more than I anticipated to keep up with the business momentum I’ve set in motion. My business is doing better than ever, but I don’t feel grounded around my kids or like I’m really connected to my life right now. It’s a weird, buzzing, superficial sort of feeling and I have a lot of anxiety. I can’t turn my mind off at night, am not sleeping, and it’s hard to keep up ahead of my mind with self coaching.
I want to feel really connected to my kids AND be able to live into a fuller version of me…and I want to live into a fuller version of me without feeling like I’m running 100 miles an hour all the time.