Puzzle Pieces 2

I wrote in before about being annoyed by my husband and got a lot out of your answer, specifically this part: “Imagine your model as puzzle pieces. Each line of the model is a piece of the puzzle and once we click them all in place we can then start to see the whole picture.”

First, to answer the question posed: I’d like to think instead “Wow, my husband is so thoughtful to come share an idea with me.” I’d also like to try applying this concept to a new situation, this time at work:

C: Coworker calls to ask what I think of my boss as she is considering applying to work for him too.
T: “Oh no, it sounds like she wants this job, but she has no idea what she’s getting herself into”
F: Conflicted
A: Get stuck on negative thoughts about my boss while talking to her. Try to hide negative thoughts by not sharing fully what I really think about my boss. Say “I don’t want to be negative” several times, even though I’m just sharing my honest (but somewhat censored) experience as she requested. Miss focusing on why she may enjoy the job or my boss. Mull over the conversation later. Worry that maybe there’s something wrong with me for not liking my boss.
R: I have no idea of what she wants to get into by applying for this job (in other words, she seems okay with a less than stellar boss if it means a lower stress job…but I didn’t really focus on that part of what she was saying since I couldn’t imagine anyone being happy working for him and wanted to say “Run away”)

Perhaps what I’d like to think: My coworker has valid reasons for potentially wanting to work for my boss. Or My coworker trusts my opinion.