Question about feelings and actions

Hello! I was thinking this morning about how feeling a feeling really isn’t big deal, but often why I think that I resist them is I’m afraid of the action I’d take if I did. Isn’t that why we are creating models? For example, I have a friend who I had to “break up” with several months ago and I’ve intentionally not gone to places where that person might be because I worry that how I feel will lead to an action that will cause me shame and embarrassment. Is the trick to put myself in situations that can cause me to feel anxious or afraid and learn how to process them inwardly instead of taking an action? I guess what confuses is me is that if our actions are created by our feelings, then feeling the feeling AND the action that results are both problems, potentially.