Reframing defeated


Hi coaches, question around the feeling of defeated, which I experience daily mostly regarding work:
T:”I can’t manage to do/solve this” because I have expectations that I should be able to solve x in y amount of time and I see myself not matching my expectations. From this kind of thoughts I get the F=defeated
– allowing feelings, like overwhelm anxiety T:”I should be able to allow this, so I am doing it wrong” , from which I get F=defeated

Apparently telling me something along the lines of “I am good enough, worthy enough no matter what” or “feelings will flow away when I am willing to feel them fully” are not able to make me move beyond defeated, so that I stay in defeated for even hours.

I am now wondering whether by identifying defeated as indulgent and by trying to move beyond it I am actually trying to push it away. It looks like I am believing “people who learned self coaching are able to not feel defeated”, thus “if I have a feeling of defeated in my body means I am doing it wrong”  from which I get more of defeated. So I am afraid beforehand that defeated will pop up in my day. I am then considering to reframing my relationship with defeated. Would you encourage me to do so or you have other suggestions? Very happy to hear. I would be willing to explore if I can enjoy the 50-50 so I can get to enjoy seeing myself feeling defeated, removing labels from it, not seeing it any more as a negative emotion. Do you have any suggestions on how to move in that direction?

Also, you teach here in the LCS that feelings are information to be decoded. I am having a hard time acknowledging what is the information I could get out of defeated and what to do with it, could you also briefly advise me around this? Thanks a lot, this feels precious!