I am married and have three kids at home. My husband works many different types of jobs around town. He receives calls from individuals who need his services and also for some outfitters and businesses that need his help.

I never know where he is and what he is up to. I have trust issues, and I do not want to live from this place of who is he with and what is he up to. I want to know where he is and what he is up to. I have made it my business. I don’t think it should be my business. I want to let him be him and trust that he is doing what he says he’s doing or if I have not been told then he is doing what he needs to do. My brain has made it mean he might be doing something other than working. I want to trust him and have no proof that he isn’t doing exactly what he’s told me he’s doing or working.

He notices at times that I am anxious and upset about something. We will talk about it, and he reassures me that he loves me and that he wants to be with me and nothing is going on. I want to believe him, but I am having such a hard time. I know this fear comes from insecurities I have with myself. When I feel more secure with who I am, I will then feel more secure in what we have. I want to trust him and not check in on him as much as I do from this place of fear. He is a grown man, whom I cannot control, nor do I want to. I want him to be himself and go about his day how he sees fit and feel confident that what we have is strong and secure.

How do I stop thinking about what he is up to and enjoy what I am doing and feel secure in what we have? I know I just need to choose thoughts that better serves me, but I am struggling. Thanks.