Relationship question

Here is my issue. At times, I want my husband to show an affection or behave in a certain way. If he does not, it affects me in a negative way. I understand a concept of having a manual and a power of my thoughts. I can change my T line in this model easily, but I do not want to…. I know it is irrational and immature , but to me, signs of affection are important. I do not believe that romantic relationship can be sustainable if there is no expression of physical attraction. Once again, I could work on this issue with an intentional model, but by doing that I will be consenting to something that I do not want.
I hope it is not too confusing. Thanks