Relationship with dad

Hi there, trying to get clarity or move through the thought loop I’m stuck with relating to my relationship with my dad. Our dynamic has been difficult for a very long time. His love appears to be conditional. I either do one of two things – try to mend things and get no where,, or completely ignore it and it eats away at me. I’m 30 years old, live with my fiance -am in the midst of planning a wedding,, and I’m so consumed with the family drama. How do I break free from this cycle. I have completely stopped wedding planning in fear that nothing will get better with my dad.

C – My dad is not speaking to me.
T – My dad is emotionally abusive -which will never change
F- Sad, rejected
A- Try to do thing that I think will mend our relationship (ie spend time with him at home, try to accept silence when I see him)
R- Silence continues – I become more sad and it bleeds into other areas of my life