Relationships – the manual

Hello, I need your help about relationships.
I am studying the relationships lesson and I understand the manual, and that we all have a manual for our partner and we should drop it and just accept the person as they are.
What if our partner is very often in a bad mood and shouting and there is our young kid present?
How to just accept it’s the way our partner is and our partner can act how they want?
I would like to understand better how to accept how the other person is when kids are involved. How to let go of the manual as parent we have for the other person?
I think I accept it but still hope for a change, so it’s not really accepting it, right?