Retraining my "Love" Brain – Practicing my Model


Hello friend!

I hope this note finds you and your family healthy and safe.

I am so excited to be coming to you with an intentional model that I am ready to practice.

I worked on this by myself, as well as with my sister who is also part of our coaching community, and took this to my 20 minute coaching session with one of your most fantastic coaches (we both got certified in December 2018).

I wanted to share to see if there is anything that I am overlooking or if this is pretty clean.

I also wanted to say that I have 2 specific measurable goals for April and May related to my health and my work. My sister and I were talking about how committed I am to wanting to attract in my person (a committed relationship where we both want and value the same things) and that it’s okay to put a timeframe on it, but just like with all things, if it doesn’t happen by the timeframe I set, not make it mean anything, but just keep going. The timeframe goal only helps me to show up daily for this because it’s something that I deeply want. I had to review and re-decide how I was thinking about this because in the past, I have shown up differently as a result of wanting to be in a relationship so much, that I overlooked, compromised etc. but now, it actually feels good for me to have this way of thinking because I know it’s a result that I won’t give up on and will continue to think, feel and behave in a way that creates the result if that makes sense. The emphasis is less on the timeframe and more on how I am showing up to the experience of it.

Thank you for looking at my model and for sharing what you think. I love our coaching community and all that we are doing for ourselves and each other.

So much love and gratitude to you!

C: Relationship

T: I am showing up to meeting my person in a way I never have before

F: Fired up (there are other feelings I’ve been having: excited, confident, open, honest, but I am going with fired up because it is most true to me in this moment and when I think about what it will look like I have this list below:)

A: Doing: Show up for “daily dating” which is pre-planned time in my calendar after work where I am on dating websites: JDate, Hinge and Facebook Dating, asking myself productive and purposeful questions: do I want to talk with this person? Why or why not? tell myself the truth in every phase of communication, review my want match list, finding neutral in “that must be nice” a thought I often think when it comes to seeing others who are married with kids/dogs and it’s what I want but don’t have yet to “that is nice,” because I genuinely do believe that and no longer wish to make it mean that there is a better than/worse than or that somehow my not having these things yet means that I won’t or can’t. Visualizations that are purposeful and giving myself permission to still dream of building a wonderful life with my best friend/partner but to stay present in what is

No longer doing: Going against my gut. There is no potential, only the reality in front of me. Not forcing anything, including working harder to make it fit.

Result: I show up to meet my person by or before June