I spent last weekend suffering in a depressive mood. Multiple circumstances converged and then I had some really negative thoughts about those circumstances, and myself. While in the throes of feeling especially low, I made myself do a thought download listing out all the sad thoughts.
I shared this at 1:1 coaching and my coach suggested writing a better thought for each of the thoughts that were not serving me.
As I worked through writing the better thoughts, I see that all these thoughts are just variations of the same types of thoughts I have been thinking most of my life. I just finally “puked” them all out at once and saw them.
My list of the old thought vs. new thought is below.
I feel I should create IM for the new thoughts.
I am posting this in “ask a coach”
for two reasons:
-I would like feedback for “cleaning up” the new thoughts for making IMs
-Sharing this is an action that is telling my brain I see its tricks and I am committed to choosing better thoughts
I am a loser => I am human with a human brain
I wasted the weekend watching tv => I see I was buffering, I forgive myself and can be curious about what I was avoiding
I have a lot of work to do => I choose to have a job
I never make progress => I make progress even if it may not feel that way
I don’t have any confidence=> there are many things I feel confident about
I break promises to myself => I keep promises to myself most of the time
I will never change=> I am changing a little every day
No one will ever want to be with me=> I have many people who love me
My boyfriend probably doesn’t love me => I love myself
My boyfriend will likely pull away as we get closer and break up with me=> I am happy in or out of a relationship
I hate being alone=> I observe and honor my discomfort and I can use solitude to practice self care
My sister is being horrible and creating pain for the family=>
-My sister is human
-My sister is entitled to make her own choices and think whatever she wants
-I hold my family members as able to manage any impact they experience from my sister’s behavior
My body is misaligned, scarred and broken=> My body has survived pain, trauma and taken me this far. I am grateful for it.
-All these thoughts seem true and I don’t believe I can change them=> My brain will always offer the worst case scenario out of fear of changing. I don’t have to believe it.
-I keep consuming information to help me grow but it doesn’t stick=> I take action by doing models, 1:1 coaching call and podcasts and lessons, choosing better thoughts, and practicing new strategies.
I hate my job=> I choose to work, I can quit whenever I want
I hate working=> I choose to work I don’t have to if I don’t want to
I see my face and body aging and I feel sad=> I believe radiance and beauty are feelings I can choose and are not affected by age
I am angry with how my life turned out => I forgive myself for choices I made with my unconscious human brain.
I feel defeated today=> Life is 50/50 it’s okay if today was not great