Hi Coaches!

So I have a question related to a work situation. I manage a co-worker, Krista, who I think does things that undermine my authority. I was promoted above her last year even though she has managed the marketing department for the past five years. I was given a title that put not only the marketing department reporting into me but a few other departments as well. Still, whenever she communicates about activities related to marketing, she continually refers to them as “her” department or responsibilities of only her and her direct reports. There also have been occasions when she sent an email or requested something without clearing it through me first.

Because of these reasons, my thoughts are that she is competing with me and has scarcity thinking, but then I remember what the training has taught us about how sometimes what we see in others we have in ourselves. So then I thought, well, maybe I’m the one being competitive and having scarcity thinking. So I tried to be more open and have give her more opportunities to shine, encouraging her to speak up and lead meetings. I took on the attitude of win-win – if she and our team succeeds, it’s a great reflection on all of us.

But now I am finding that this is backfiring in that she is being recognized for things and I am being left out and not being seen as her manager. For example, after trying on the thought that we can both succeed, my action was to give her more opportunity to lead meetings and take on more responsibilities. But now people are going directly to Krista, and Krista is also now setting agendas and going directly to other departments without consulting with me first.

C: Krista does not consult me prior to working with other function leaders
T: She is competing for my job
F; Defensive
A: Try to stop her initiatives; Become less open to her opinion, Do not encourage her to succeed or contribute
R: I am competing with Krista

This is the model I tried to have
C: Krista does not consult me prior to working with other function leaders
T: We can both succeed
F: Open
A; Allow Krista to lead meetings and take on more responsibilities
R: —? The result seems to be that she is succeeding and getting recognition but I am not

Can you help me stay in my model and find an abundant thought? Is it possible to be abundant when another other person who you are in a relationship with may not be?