Self Image and breaking patterns

Hi team.

Over the last few years my weight has been up and down. I go through spells of committing to improving my weight and then I self-sabotage and eat crap and put the weight back on.

I collect lots of evidence to prove that this is my reality.

I have bad thoughts about how I look and how ugly I am. I feel uncomfortable in my own skin and have a very loud inner critic who literally has self hate for what I see in the mirror.

Where do I start?