Self Judgement: Believing new things

I have been doing work in Decisions. I am realizing over and over, that I get disappointed in myself, when it doesn’t go as planned. Believing New Things, would sound something like…………….?
And I’m still soooo disappointed in myself, if I have, for example, sworn at my five year old. I am very happy with my new found awareness at all my frequent, judgmental thoughts. But I am finding myself wanting to speed up this awareness process, even though the future “there”, is no better than “here.” What do I do? Do I write myself another note from my future self?
Feeling impatient 😉