self Neglect

A while ago I got myself into a habit of self-neglect. This was during a period when I had major depression and was just unable to get out of bed and had thoughts of dying. After therapy and doing the work I learned from Scholars I have reached a place where I am starting to function again and have begun learning to love myself and to care for myself.

I am not yet at the place where I am able to show up for myself 100%. For example; When I have a dip in mood or start spiraling with negative thoughts I fall back into that habit of self-neglect and forcing myself to keep working and pushing ahead even if my body is tired or hungry or my mind needs a break.

When that happens my mind begins creating angry thoughts and says mean things to me (one example would be ‘you eat like a disgusting animal’) and obviously such thoughts will make me feel very sad.

Today I was able to stop and apologize to myself for neglecting my needs and went to take the best care I could (cooked a good meal, pampered my skin, stopped working, and put away all my work stuff) after doing that my brain felt happy.

Now that I have understood this mechanism what can I do to prevent those horrible thoughts that drive a sadness spiral and push me further away from showing up for myself? Are there any resources I can look into or having better practices around switching off, downtime, or stop neglecting myself?