Should I be more careful/selective about who I spend time with? Why do I feel worse after being around those with indulgent emotions?


This month’s work talks about indulgent emotions and it really hit home for me. I am and used to be the kind of person who indulged a lot, especially in victimization and overwhelm. As I’ve been doing this work on myself, I’ve noticed how others tend to indulge in emotions like these too. More specifically, a group of friends that I used to be close with.

After spending time with them, I notice that I feel worse emotionally. I find myself wanting to distance myself from them and detach. Is this a bad thing? Does this mean I am judging them, or that I am somehow “mentally weak” and their indulgent emotional patterns “rub off” on me when I’m around them?

Should I pursue friendships with people who are more intentional about the emotions that they feel and are less prone to these emotional patterns? Part of me really wants to get away from this friend group. The other part of me is scared – both that I will be friendless or a bad friend if I do this with my friends, and that I am not good enough to make new friends who have the mindset and energy I’d rather spend time around.