Should we NOT make models for other people


Should we NOT make models for other people to try because we can only imagine what their thinking? My husband suggested I do that to try to put myself in someone else’s shoes.

(C) My sister in law, Anna, my sister in law, and her mother-in-law went to the basement to watch my highlight wedding video. Afterwhich, Anna put on her video from 12 years ago. (T) I instantly decided that she didn’t really care about me because she didn’t gush over my video enough and just wanted to show hers. I decided that she ALWAYS had done similar things the WHOLE time during my ENTIRE wedding preparation too. (F) I felt SOOOOO disgusted and annoyed at Anna. I was soo mad (A) I stayed and watched her video a little and complimented her and her husband. THEN I left before it was done (I watched about 20 min) and went outside to call my aunt and complain about Anna. Incidentally, my aunt confirmed my thoughts and feelings and said Anna was only validation seeking and I shouldn’t be friends with her. (R) I decided I didn’t want to be friends with Anna and my whole Labor weekend was colored by this (I decided extremely negative) event.

I worked a long time to change this model cause I felt sucky!

I changed it to

C Anna put in her video after mine
T Oh well.
T Maybe she wanted to feel close to me in that moment by sharing something with me.
T In either case, this circumstance is not very hostile or even that much of a big deal.
F fine,
F not much feelings,
F shruggy shoulders feeling,
A Chat with Anna throughout the week on FB, text and Marco Polo her and schedule a catch up chat on the phone on Saturday
R I feel like Anna and I can be friends

Wow. I feel soooooo much better. I hope these models are sort of right. Can we put other people’s thoughts in our models? Can I put a feeling in the result line?

Thanks!! Feeling better every day.