Sister judges my choices

C: Sister says “private schools reinforce structural privilege and kids should go to the rougher schools to lift others up.” (In context where I am discussing my decision to send my kids to an expensive and exclusive school.)
T: I am always on egg shells around her (ie: she judges me)
F: Mean
A: Complain to husband, say nasty things about her and her choices to him, ruminate, get defensive, disengage from conversation with her
R: ?
I would like to be neutral- maybe just think, this is my sister being my sister. I don’t know what result Iā€™m creating here