Sister will be mad


Here’s what’s up: My sister invited my friend and I on a beach trip. I asked about it a few weeks later, and she told me specific dates for the 8-night trip. My friend and I don’t want to go for 8 nights, so we said we would come for 5. My sister responded that she didn’t realize we weren’t coming the whole time, and that she was planning to ask us to bring her dog in our car. (We didn’t know about this, but it’s not possible, given our other plans.)

I have a big story about all of this, because my sister and I have a tense relationship anyway. Now I’m panicking that she’ll be mad at me. The bottom line is I have NO desire to be there for 8 nights and no desire to coach myself toward desiring it. I want to learn to say no. Right now, I’m doing a LOT of internal negotiating and playing out my side vs her side.

I want to just let her be upset with me if she wants to be, but I find that really scary.

Signed,

A sister pleaser

(Thank you!)