Sitting with current thoughts vs. moving to a bridge thought

How do I know when to create and move on to a bridge thought? Specifically (and for example) I have resentful thoughts towards my husband and humiliating feelings about borrowing money from family. I have hung on to these thoughts and feelings for years despite the fact that circumstances have changed. Intellectually, I understand that these thoughts and feelings are not serving me but not willing to let go emotionally. Guess it is my need to blame.
C – Borrowed $ from brother and mother-in -law T- my husband should have provided for us and not put us in this situation F- humiliated A – asked for the $ R- borrowed the money with resentment

could think that I am grateful that family was able and willing to help us out but emotionally not willing to stop blaming my husband. Please help on how to proceed – watch my negative thought loops about it or work on a model that moves me into a different thought and if so, what?? Many thanks!!