Snarky teen

I’m having a hard time ignoring my kid’s snarkiness towards me while I’m trying to show up the way I want. I spent a lot of time yelling at one point and I dont want to do that anymore. But the rude behavior is bothersome and I feel like I’m the one who needs to teach that it’s not acceptable. The problem is that my old way would be to say “this isn’t acceptable” and either yell or give a consequence. Now I just ignore the snarkiness and act like it’s not happening. That doesnt feel right either. But if I push by saying something like “I dont like the way you’re speaking to me” then it will be met with “this is just my voice and you just dont understand the way I talk. You always think the worst of me”. This gets me angry and I fall back into my old ways. And since I dont want to do that, I ignore the way its said and just address the words. But it feels wrong. Like I should be doing more to teach manners, etc.