You noted you “want him to be a good member of society” and you believe “it’s your job to lead this boy into being a man.” These are some of your thoughts about parenting. What does each of these sentences mean for you as you parent?
I just want to do the best job I can. I have some guilt about parenting in the past but I try to let that go and be the best parent I can now. I think parenting is hard as a solo mum and harder when he has ADHD and Oppositional Defiance Disorder.
What comes up for you when it comes time to enforce a rule or boundary? For example, why is it a problem for you when your son says words to the waitress? Or bumps into someone on his scooter?
These things are a problem because it’s not who I want my son to be. He doesn’t care if he is rude or hurts someone. I want him to care about others. I want him to have empathy.
What if the discomfort you might experience as you help him be a good member of society is just part of being a loving parent?
Why do other parents have children who aren’t as rude? Why did I get stuck with one so hard?