Spiraling in self-doubt and negativity


I’ve been trying to do the thought work to clean out my brain and to practice new thoughts, but I don’t think they’re enough. I’m in a position where I need to go out and find clients and I’m finding myself being too paralyzed to take the action I know I need to. The fear of failure, constant self-doubt, and negativity are consuming me and I’m starting to feel apathy as well. The thoughts come up: “Do I even want this goal that I’m trying to go after? It’d be so much easier and less stressful if I just went back to corporate and got a stable normal job.” I haven’t found any bridge thoughts that are believable yet, every time I practice a bridge thought I feel a sense of “yeah, right”. What is wrong with me? Why am I getting in my own way so much?! It’s the most frustrating thing because I want to believe I could be and do more and yet there’s this strong aversion to now want to move forward.