stream of thoughts and feelings during meal


Hi, I list here a chain of thoughts and feeling I experience on a weekly basis at least before and during a meal.

* C hunger + the clock says the time I tend to have dinner have passed
* T I see my brain going in autopilot wanting and wanting.
* F desire (with added agitated quality)
* T With all these feelings It will be very hard to control myself
* F fear (with added agitated quality)
* T let’s see eat something and check if feelings get better on the way
* F Entitled
* A eat a small bite of something
* T I should change the way I am eating this, but I don’t know how
* F confused – agitated
* A I don’t know, lets eat another bite and see if I can figure it out later
* F entitled
* A eat another bite
* T my thoughts-feeling relationship with this meal is messed up I do not know when to stop
* F confused – agitated
* T If I stop and ask myself I will just end up spinning with my brain, it will be uncomfortable, urged hunger will not damp down, and ultimately I will want to restart eating again afterwards >>
* T Rushing to the end of the meal + beating myself up afterwards looks like the less painful alternative, because it is familiar
* T I have to figure it out quickly, lets finish this soon
* A define my fullness in a hurry
* R often overeat + meal accompanied by emotional discomfort + beat myself up

When I get caught into this flow of thoughts and feelings I feel like I am in a tunnel and I try to harry up getting to the other side (I know this also is just a thought). I think I have strong awareness of what is happening in the moment but I struggle to take action to get off the autopilot mode in that moment. Any suggestions on how to start small actions that help me deviate from the habitual behaviours? Thanks