Struggling with being on time


Hello! I’ve got an issue with being on time. Everyone knows me as someone who is always late. I’ve sort of just accepted this, and decided to try to be OK with it. Not beat myself up every time I’m running late. Because I’ve tried so many times to overcome this issue, but nothing seems to help me be on time- to work, meetings, the movies, dinner with friends etc. I’d like my result to be “on time” to work. It’s in quotes because I’m lucky enough to work somewhere that doesn’t seem to care too much about punctuality, as long as the work gets done.

I would like to get to work by 9am each morning – or even sooner! I find myself getting there anywhere from 9:20-9:45 and this is an issue because 1) it forces me to stay later than I’d like to. 2) I’m continually feeling bad about myself even though I am adding a lot of value still to the company and 3) while no one has said anything, I know it’s not the best look.

The issue I think is that I stay up too late working on my other projects (working on breaking into another industry) and then decide I need to sleep in a little later when I’m putting my alarm on for the next morning. I’m also always really worried about getting enough sleep. But the weird thing is that even when I do wake up earlier — stress will do that — I still find myself leaving the house at the same time and getting to work within the same (late!) time frame.

Here are my models. I’m struggling to find the right thought to get me to leave on time for my Intentional Model

C: Arriving to work in the morning
T: I’m a bad person because I’m always late, but there’s nothing I can do about it
(also: I’m always late no matter what I do. I can’t possibly get to work when I want to)
F: anxious, panicked, regretful
A: Wake up later, or snooze and stay in bed. Putter around with coffee, getting ready. Take forever to get dressed. Leave the house at the same (late) time every day. Sometimes decide I “deserve” to get a coffee at the coffee shop on the way to work.
R: Get to work at 9:30 and feel bad about it – live in a constant state of panic and like I’m not good enough for my job

Intentional Model

C: Arriving to work in the morning
T: (I’m not sure here? Ideas for thoughts: I owe it to myself to feel organized and in control. I deserve to be on time. Others are counting on me. The day will feel better if I’m on time)
F: Determined, calm, organized, under control, confident in my timing
A: Leave the house by 8:40 AM
R: Get to work by 9am

thank you for your help!!