Struggling with the concept of the model and answers here

Since I started Scholars, it’s evident that human beings operate from thoughts and thoughts create our feelings, however, when I read some of the answers to people’s questions here, I find it extremely difficult to understand how any circumstance can be neutral when it comes to certain life circumstances and other peoples behavior. I am also trying to wrap my mind around how we shouldn’t have manuals for people because everyone has their own values and how we would like to be treated by strangers, friends, loved ones etc. (Yes, these are all thoughts) How can all circumstances be neutral in a situation where there are affairs in a marriage, physical and emotional abuse, someone who cons you, people that curse and raise their voice at you etc. If you are married and your spouse is not treating you with love and respect, is someone to feel neutral about it all? Act like all is okay when it’s not? Is it really possible to live from an intentional place all of the time?