T = I’m different


Here is my current model :

C: adhd + iq 150
T : I’m different
F : shame
A : people please, being always happy and friendly with everybody, making lots of jokes and funny faces, acting impertinent and provocative for fun, pretending not to know things, forbidding myself to find things easy, staying in jobs where I am not a good fit, not showing my art and my writings, forbidding myself to produce art and writings. As a coach, I set a barrier between me and my client that is really preventing from doing my best.
R : not allowing me to be myself

“I’m different” is really a very strong belief that I am trying to get rid of. I tried to bridge think with “I am a human”, or even “I notice that I’m thinking that I’m different”, but I don’t see great results there, and it doesn’t feel good. I wonder if accepting being different wouldn’t serve me better.
Could the thought “I’m different” produce something else than shame? And how to work on it?
I am just realizing that maybe LGBT+ teachings could be a great help for me, but I would be very grateful of any of your advice. Thank you.