I have a belief that if I work hard and struggle I will succeed. This struggle is an internal energy. It is battle like. It constricts. I fight it and it gains power. When I sign up for my chosen life challenges, in the excitement of possibility I forget that I will choose struggle as part of the process. I enter the challenge and it is there, at times effecting my breathing and sleeping. I have learned to co exist with this strange enemy. It has a partnership with fear of failure. It tells me I will not be good enough. It reminds me of what I don’t know. I could choose self pity and sometimes do.
I am over it. Struggle is exhausting me.
Here are my models
C My approach to my creative work
T If I work hard and struggle I will be successful
F Fear
A Put off beginning but eventually do the creative work anyway mostly within this energy
R Artworks which show fear and struggle

C My approach to creative work
T I embrace the process of my creative work as a discovery
F Acceptance
A Do the creative work
R Create works which are more authentic

Brooke, considering my long term relationship with fear and struggle, my question is how do I practice the art of feeling acceptance, giving in, or surrender. They seem to be the opposites of struggle and for me are elusive. To surrender is to lose.
Could you also comment on the way I have created my models above.
Thanks for the opportunity to look at my fear and struggle.
Marianne P