The binging-restricting cycle

Hi Brooke,

I started my weight loss journey almost a year and a half ago at 189 lbs and got down to 152 last month (half way to my Impossible Goal)! I have not been that weight in about 5 years. I have been doing intermittent fasting with an 8-hour eating window of 2 meals per day. Unfortunately, last month I started having intense urges to binge eat when I’m alone after work, which was how I had originally gained my weight. I think the binges are due to fear of not being able to lose any more weight. I have been consuming huge amounts of food to the point of feeling sick. The next day, I always “re-commit,” and do a long, extended fast and feel the flour and sugar withdrawal again. It’s a terrible cycle. I usually gain about 5-6 lbs of water weight on the scale over the course of 2 days, then restrict again and lose most of it.

Even though I haven’t really gained much weight back, I remain around 153-156 lbs and I don’t want to continue in this binging-restricting cycle. It makes me feel so sick and embarrassed.

C- 152 lbs
T- “I don’t know if I can lose more weight.”
F- Anxious
A- Binge eat
R- Gain water weight and re-commit to fasting the next day

Where can I go from here? Is this just a case of self-sabotage? I am tired of the beatings and am on the verge of totally giving up 🙁