Hi. I am newly dating a musician. Seeing this guy has uprooted ALL of my insecurities. And through thought work, I can see that I am projecting my insecurities onto him. The big one right now is– He probably doesn’t want to be seen with me.

I ask him to invite me to one of his gigs. The fact that he has not already (we’ve been seeing each other, quite intimately, for 3 weeks now) invited me with gusto, makes me feel like he is avoiding it. Like he doesn’t want people to see us together. Like he doesn’t want to be seen with me.

When I dive a little deeper into myself, I realize my thoughts are –“I” wouldn’t want anyone to be seen with ME. My skin is a mess and I’m overweight. Shit, I don’t WANT to be seen. I don’t want to be judged against him. These are MY thoughts, but I have already attributed them to him, in my head. He doesn’t think I’m good enough. When, really, I don’t think I’m good enough.

This shit is painful. And I imagine it’s why I’ve been overeating big time since we’ve been seeing each other. I’d like to get comfortable with “being seen”. Any tips, suggestions, or helpful questions? Thank you.