The In Between

Next week I begin Life Coach Certification and I seriously can’t wait! I am SOOOO excited and SOOOO scared!

The background: I’ve worked from a very young age and prided myself on my capabilities and that I was not financially reliant on anyone else. At the age of 40 (I’m 51 now), I had my second child (a daughter) to go with my 14-year old son. I did not plan to have a second child. It was a bit of a shock and took me a few months to wrap my head (and heart) around having another baby. Due to my age, I was concerned about birth defects and had some genetic testing done. On Valentines day 2006, I learned the the baby was developing normally and was a girl. From that point, I was ALL-IN and totally in love. My husband has his own business and provides very well for our family. Due to his crazy schedule with his business, I decided to only work part-time after Kylie was born. My company was more than accommodating but I held a significant amount of responsibility (Director of HR and Administration) and preformed at a certain level. So I cut my in-office hours and reduced my salary but I still felt like I worked full-time. So I had big job, a new baby, a son in high school and a husband that worked a lot. I had very little ability to manage stress back then. I was a control freak. Add in the nursing and getting a parasite called Giardia, it was the perfect storm for my immune system to tank and to contract a serious virus called Cytomeglavirus (CMV). I ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks and my life has never looked the same. That was about 11 years ago. Since then, I have quit my job, stayed home with my kids, got certified in yoga, got a life coaching and corporate coaching certifications, taken HR project work, obtained a certification in applied positive psychology and then found you and joined self-coaching scholars 7 months ago. I love, love, love everything that you are about and do and had to learn from the best so I start the certification program on Apr 1.

I also teach 5 yoga classes at the best studio in our area (I’ve been there since they opened 8 years ago). I launched a monthly program called Women, Wine, and Well-Being where I share the practices proven by the Science of Positive Psychology with other women in a “Happy Hour”, do employee workshops for an area organization, and some life coaching but I never really got traction here. In full disclosure, I have been a life coach for 5 years but have had about a dozen clients. The LCS program is going to be do or die for me when it comes to making a business out of coaching.

Something else that you should know. As of 10 days ago, I have stopped teaching and practicing yoga due to a shoulder injury. This took up a significant part of my week and gave my brain and body some support and enough of a diversion to manage my mind. Honestly, I am bit depressed.

Since I have so much free time, I am entertaining thoughts of going back to work in a corporate setting. My thoughts include “I am really tired of hustling”, “I have lots of freedom with my schedule, but am always thinking about how to refine my website, my message, create a new blog posting, or my next WWW program, or how to get coaching clients” and so on. So in truth, I feel like I don’t have a lot of freedom. Freedom could be using all my skills for another company versus trying to build a business. I also miss being a part of a team. I think I am more extrinsically motivated versus internally motivated. I feel I am at 80% in most areas of my life…my work, my marriage, my weight, my health, my home. I have so much to be grateful for yet, I want 100%…it’s just getting from 80 to 100% seems like it is exponentially harder. I also feel like I should take this time to work on myself versus trying to fix someone else life.

Now that you are up to date, here is my question…Can you give me some advice on sorting all these variables out? Should I just be patient and dig into the coaching training before I change anything? Is not teaching/practicing, giving me more clarity because I don’t have the distraction? Or is the extra space and time coloring my view on everything?

I would love to decide once and for all, how to best serve in this world and to live a 100% life.

Thank you so much.