The reason u joint

So i’m in scs since 5 months and i joined because of my relationship.

Because I have like the best boyfriend and relationship but my mind always tells me a negative story about it and I believe it to the point where I think it’s the truth.

Now I got to the point where I realize that and I know whats going on. BUT I don’t know how to NOT believe it. On how to NOT CHOOSE to believe it. I’m still in the place where when I choose the positive story it doesn’t feel true and it always going back to the negative story. (negative story feels more true)

And then I get really anxious and panic, because I don’t want to believe these thoughts cause they lead to the action. And I don’t like the action they bring.

I feel helpless and really anxious.

I had several 10minutes calls on that. And the last one we agreed on saying “stop brain” when I have these negative thoughts. But it doesn’t work.

Negative story I tell myself: (I don’t have the exact thought, just like a feel towards him or what I tell myself)

I’m like the girl that just thinks of him as this wonderful guy, but I don’t have the strong feelings I want to have about a man I’m in a relationship with.
I will break up because he’s not enough.

BUT it’s not always like that. I have a lot of good good days, where I think I can’t life without him and so thankful and attracted. And he’s my man, and my right person.

On the other days, I can really notice how I tell myself the negative story.

Also I imagine what my friends other people would say:

You can’t force any feelings

Some things aren’t meant to be

Can you please help?

Its really important to me that I can manage this.

Thank you so much!!