I am a scholar for almost three years and have lost 50 pounds on my first 8 months of being a scholar.
When I’ve reached maintenance I started having exception thoughts and acted on them and gained 30 pounds back.
I have been going on protocol and off of it for the past year, losing the same 8 pounds, gaining them back, changing protocols, overeating, doing models, thoughts downloads, etc.
I am actually excited that I need to lose these 30 pounds again, because it made me realize that my previous success as a scholar did not work long-term for me. I did not know but I was using willpower throughout these 8 months and now I get to really allow unpleasant emotions and learn how to feel them for real.
I printed out for myself scripts and focus thoughts to think when I’m having urges to overeat and I understand that at the moment I’m having a thought of “I want this” but I still act upon it.
And so it made me wonder if I really understand that “I want this is just a thought” is something I really really understand.
In the moment, when I say that to myself, my brain answers back, “Yeah, I know, but I still want this.”
And I answer, “But it’s just a thought. I want this is just a sentence.”
And still my brain says, “Yeah, I get that, but I still want this now.”
So how is it different to really understand that a thought we’re having is really just a thought?