Hi Brooke,

A couple of calls ago you told some one who “fell off the wagon” that “THERE IS NO WAGON”. Okay, that was totally awesome and blew my mind. It just jolted me in a way I can’t explain. It opened up a new paradigm for me, a world without the “diet wagon”. The idea of being “good” or “bad”. Being “on” or being “off” a diet. It also woke me up to the deep seated diet mentality that I have lived with my entire life. Intellectually I have understood it for years. I read Bruce Lipton, The Biology of Belief. It changed my life and I thought I got it. But now realize it was all an intellectual pursuit.

When you looked into the camera and said “There is no wagon!” It was like you slapped me. At that moment I knew that I had to change my thinking if I am ever going to lose weight and keep it off forever. (Duh!) It was like a stream of thoughts just opened up. If I am not falling off the wagon, than what am I doing? If I stopped living with the diet mentality and just witnessed my actions without judgement what could I learn about myself? If I was not obsessed with my weight, food, and the number on the scale what would I do with that extra time? Who am I with out the wagon? Who am I without “the weight problem”? WTF!

So, in March I went on vacation and my protocol went by the wayside. Since then I have been off protocol, trying to find a way back that doesn’t feel like diet mentality. I have been allowing it to be okay and witnessing how it feels. I have learned a lot, and also have been fighting the “good/bad” feelings intensely. It feels like I am definitely in the river of misery. How do I find my way back to the protocol and address the diet mentality issue? HELP!