Thought Life

Hello, I have realized that I do not like being left alone with my thoughts. There are so many all the time, and most are negative or self-defeating. They have me living in fear of the future, resentful of the past, and not really living in the now. So many are subconscious, and I am on the journey in Self Coaching Scholars to become aware of the thoughts and begin to try and think of better thoughts that could also be equally or more true.

Thought downloads, watching the webinars, and using the model are all tools I am currently practicing. But my thought life has had a huge running start before these new practices, so it feels like I’m not changing or maybe not fast enough.

My question is surrounding all of the thoughts. Is this normal that they seem overwhelming that I want to distract myself with social media, getting advice, TV, self-help, and whatever else? The thoughts tend to be around:

Fear of being alone, people leaving me, betrayal, not getting out of hard times, feeling too much.

If I were the kind of person who managed their thoughts with ease and let life happen, and didn’t try to control everything out of fear, life would be easier. I see my higher self wanting to let go of control, but it is like a tug-a-war.