Thought work keeping us from action?


Hi Brooke–

Lately I’ve been concerned by the amount of money my fiance spends (on things I don’t think are necessary on a tight budget). Here’s the model I came up with:

C: fiance spends money
T: My fiance spends money irresponsibly.
F: irritation, anxiety
A: I am tense and short with him and bug him about spending less
R: He gets irritated with me? (But I don’t think this makes him spend more, so I don’t think it proves my T).

So first off, I’m not sure how the end of this model should go. Secondly, running a model on this didn’t exactly feel helpful. I feel like it helped me probe my emotions but I still don’t really know what to do with them. Should I run an intentional model to feel peace and calm about our finances (when it could cause circumstances that I don’t want…and don’t want to want–lol) or leave my emotions as is so I care about the money enough to push him towards more frugal living? Is there another option?