Thoughts that lead to desire for sex

I have been doing lots of thought work regarding my sex life over the past couple of months and could use some help. First of all- I do love my husband very much but I need to figure out a way to want to have sex because it hasn’t been there for me for a number of years. As a side note- I have been working diligently on stopover drinking and seeing great progress in that area. If only I just swap out my former loooove for red wine/margaritas for sex… Please tell me the secret to that swap!

T he needs this
F obligated
A go through the motions, don’t truly connect, transactional exchange
R blah

I have done many other models on my thoughts about sex being dirty, my resentment, shame etc. so I can see that none of the thoughts I am having now are serving me. Awareness? Check.

I know that the good news is I am responsible for my thoughts and I WANT to generate thoughts the lead to desire so I will feel sexy and willing to open up to the experience. The thoughts I have on my short list (I’m sexy, I’m so lucky that my husband finds me so attractive) are not believable to me and need some help with laddering thoughts maybe? I have heard you say before “I have a body” is it as easy as that?

Appreciate your insight with this 🙂