Thoughts Rooted in Fear

I haven’t been enjoying my job lately, but do like the freedom it gives me and my family in the way of my income.
I realized today when doing a thought download and asking myself “why” on a few things that I’ve been trying to motivate myself to stick to my work schedule by reminding myself that it gives me income… but why do I want the income? Because I’m afraid of what happens if I don’t have it.

It’s like a lightbulb went off that, no wonder I’m not doing my best working from this place rooted in fear.

I was wondering how to best structure a model with the newly found belief. I can’t seem to structure my model where I actually see that feeling of fear.

C: I have a job.
T: I like feeling the safety the income gives me.
F: Stuck
A: Buffer when work comes on my schedule; do bare minimum work
R: I don’t perform 100% and don’t feel safe in my job (I feel at risk of eventually losing my job due to my decreased performance)

I would love an extra set of eyes on the model above. I’m not sure what C and T would really get the “fear” into the F line, though. Any suggestions?

Also in line with the fear I’ve uncovered, I notice that I have been trying to “choose” work, but instead I’ve been feeling like I have to due to this fear of losing that income… If I go to worst case scenario, I think “we take on debt, and then I find a new job.” But that that solution feels like it’s also playing off that fear. Hoping to bring this to my coaching session, but would love some feedback before then. 🙂 Thank you!