Traumatic Past

Hi Brooke, I was listening to your audio today and someone said they had a “bad childhood of abuse growing up” and you mentioned that it was bad based on their thoughts on the circumstance. I had to re-listen twice to try and understand your thoughts on this but I am still stuck. I do understand that our thoughts on the circumstance create our feelings. However given situations such as rape, trauma, assault, child abuse, how do we feel neutral? How can one say that it wasn’t a bad circumstance? OR are we to think of it as
“Yes that was bad however I have grown from it and learned a lot through the experience”.
For example, I think I have a dysfunctional relationship with my family. However, now I am starting to try and think ” My family life WAS tough but it has made me the person I am today and will help me be a great therapist especially for clients that have similar situations”. So I acknowledge how I felt about it before but that I can see its silver lining now.

Sorry just feel really confused but I know it’s an important concept. Can you try with a circumstance such as “I was in an abusive relationship”.

Thank you in advance