Understanding what you mean when you say unconditional love.

In your answer to me about my model, my take away is that if I can learn to love this person unconditionally, problem solved. I do love her but feel guarded because of the history of her behavior. We all hurt each other and do things out of line with who we want to be. I am a very forgiving person. But this has been going on since I have been in her life. It seem to never end. How can you not be affected by someone lying to you and purposely being mean. Aren’t we suppose to confront and hold people accountable? I don’t mean in a mean way but just not letting them get away with bad behavior and at the right time. Not in front of others, or not to shame, but just being honest and clearing the air. Otherwise it feels fake to me. Do you have a podcast or two that maybe could clarify this for me. I appreciate you help with this.